The Spark
by hopezen
Summary: Shrine Tag - Rodney seeks Jennifer out a couple of days after their journey to Talus - McKeller


_If I owned any rights to the franchise or the characters, it wouldn't be a fanfic would it? Enjoy!_

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Jeanie had been following him around like he was going to keel over at any moment, so he hadn't been able to seek her out earlier. And not that he didn't like the attention his sister was bestowing him, he wanted to talk to her alone. Though, he didn't really know why it really mattered. What he had to tell her wasn't anything to be embarrassed about.

He wasn't quite sure what he was doing. And even though she was still in the infirmary, she must be working on something very important. He usually saw her out and about, but the last few days she had been busy, he guessed.

When he made it to the infirmary, it was quiet and dark. It was the middle of the night and there weren't any patients, which was unusual, and so all the staff was off for the night. All except Jennifer. Full security access had its advantages.

"Jennifer!" Rodney yelled through the infirmary. When he got no answer, he made his way through the darker then usual infirmary back to her office.

"Uh, Jennifer?" he whispered though he wished he hadn't disturbed her.

He found her sitting at her desk, which wasn't much of a surprise, but she sat staring at a blank computer screen. She looked so sad. He almost forgot why he was there.

The spark was gone. Even in the darkest of times, she had this light that brought a shimmer of hope. Now, there was no sign of that light, that spark. There was only damp cheeks and red eyes.

"Rodney?" she panicked dropping the remote that sat in her hands.

"I'm sorry… I didn't mean to…Is everything okay?" his hands danced together in front of him. He wanted to run, but something compelled him to stay.

"Yeah," she wiped her eyes doing her best to recover. "There really hasn't been much going on here and I've just been thinking too much."

"Well," he took a couple of small steps struggling to keep his hands still, "I can certainly emphasize. I haven't had anything to do for three days. All I've been thinking about is what I can't remember," he smiled in as good as humor as he could muster.

"You win," she sniffled with a grateful grin. "How have you been doing?"

"Great…" this wasn't going as he planned. "I, uh," he was trying to find the right words. They were so simple, but they had left his brain. She always had this effect on him, but he was usually much better at hiding it. "I wanted to thank you…again."

"Rodney," she was smiling, touched by his sincerity, "you don't have to…"

"Yes, I do," he stood right next to her stiffening a bit. "You took a lot of crap on my behalf," he had been very offended by what his team mates had said about her not letting go of her convictions and letting them go to the planet sooner. "Including mine," he admitted.

"And…I wanted to let you know," he flustered again. "As frustrating as it was for me, it must have been just as bad for you. You were there with me every waking moment. And it was a great comfort to know you were going to be there. So, thank you," he patted her hand sitting on the desk.

"You are very welcome," she said softly and her smile got warmer as she moved her hand to hold his.

"So, uh," she was still smiling, but stared at the firm yet gentile hold on him. "What are you doing here so late?" he asked when he realized that he wasn't going to get his hand back.

"Oh," she had been lost in her thoughts and quickly pulled her hand back to her lap. "I was…" she tried to think of something clever to say however the truth was all she wanted to say. "I was reviewing," she stuttered slightly, "your video logs."

"Really?" he looked at her like she was crazy. "Why?" he immediately tensed up. His whole being filled with worry of what he may have said or done while on the edge.

"You told me something," she looked to the screen again. When he looked at her like that, she had to turn away. "And I need to know if you meant it?" she needed to ask. If she didn't, she would regret it forever. And if she didn't do it at that precise moment, she never would.

"What?" he was on the verge of trembling he was so nervous.

She didn't answer him. She couldn't answer him. She turned on the screen and pressed play. The recording was right where she knew it would be. She had watched it over and over and over.

"Jennifer…" Rodney became transfixed with his image on the screen. "Uh, there's something I wanted to, uh…While I remember…While I still can. There's something I wanted to say, before, um…I, um…I love you. I've loved you for some time now," she had those tears again as she turned off the screen.

"Well?" Jennifer stammered as she faced him. She felt as if she was standing in the middle of a room with thousands of eyes on her.

Rodney didn't know what to say. He stood perfectly still with his mouth open. Even his brain seemed stuck. Part of him was horrified that he actually admitted it. The rest of him was trying to figure out what to do now. Admit it. Or deny it.

"Jennifer," he looked into her soft wet eyes, "you're…I'm…"

Even if he knew what he would say, his brain and his mouth weren't communicating. He became lost in her gaze. The sadness in her face was enough to break his heart. He finally stopped trying to think, and the answer was right there in front of him.

He memorized her features, closed his eyes, and prepared himself. It only took a matter of seconds, but to him, it felt like hours.

With his eyes shut, he moved to cradle her head and to find her lips.

He had ambushed her, but she didn't fight it. She imagined what it would be like to kiss the infamous Meredith Rodney McKay, and she wasn't about to stop it. In fact, she welcomed it. He was forceful enough to take her breath away, yet he was soft and gentle enough to leave her wanting.

Kissing her was sweeter then he could have ever dreamed. He felt lighter when he realized that she hadn't decked him or gone running screaming down the corridors. This felt right, and he didn't want to stop but he needed to give her a chance to turn him down. He just needed to do this. He needed to prove to himself that he really did love her.

When he pulled back, his eyes were still closed. He opened them slowly, fearful that she may have disappeared or been a mere figment of his imagination. Yet there she was staring up at him. She had no smile and still stained cheeks, but there was a joy, a light, a spark, in her face that gave him hope.

They looked into each other's eyes. They were catching their breaths neither sure what to do next. Rodney feared that speaking would ruin the moment and he may never feel this elated again. Jennifer feared that moving would prevent him from ever speaking to her again.

"Jennifer," Rodney took a deep breath and finally spoke, "you are a stunning woman. Not only are you incredibly gorgeous," the motions of his hands conveyed his sincerity, "you have this…aura that is absolutely beautiful," he couldn't believe how eloquent his words sounded and how easy it was to make them come out. "You make me want to be a better man," he couldn't believe he admitted that. "So, yes. I meant every word."

Just as before, she couldn't respond. Even though this time, she knew he truly meant it. There was no parasite to excuse it. She was in a state of euphoria. The normally surly and sarcastic Rodney McKay was spouting poetry to her. About her. She had quickly learned that there was more to the hyperactive astrophysicist then he wanted people to realize, but this was beyond her imagination. She had been pleasantly surprised when she found him talking to Carson while he was in stasis, but this blew her away.

He stood in front of her. He was still close. So close that she could feel the heat from his body on her legs. Her gaze was locked in his wonderful blue eyes. She could see him waiting for her to say something. Anything.

"Good," she almost couldn't get it to come out. She was crying and laughing while she said it. "Because I think I'm falling in love with you too."


End file.
